Today, my friends was not a good day.
It was just one of those days, where absolutely everything was going wrong. And the little things were enormous to me. I cried quite a bit today, sorry to my love andrew for being such a hassle. He had to deal with me from when we both woke up to the end of our day. Ahh, well I am PMSing right now, it just ended though, thank god. I'm always so damn difficult when mother nature comes around. Anyway, this entire day had me going through an emotional breakdown. I didn't realize just how stressed I actually am. { Irrelevent, but um is it bad to want kids now? And want to be married already? I feel oold already but still so premature. I guess it just has to do with being with Andrew :) } So I started my day later than I wanted to, ending it on a note of bad cuddling, waking up to andrew, which is good, but I was grumpy. So I woke up to his mom, bad hair and stress. Boo :\ Then we proceed to school, which does NOT make things better. I go with andrew, feeling a little inadequate in the looks department today, to school, allll irritated and angry. This is me >=\ I get to school and take all this anger and frustration out on Andrew, which he doesn't take lightly too. I guess i'm good at pushing him away when I need him. I'm angry, and I have an hour and a half to kill, so I leave since I realize that I still need to buy notecards for HW today, in which we were supposed to get some in the morning, but we woke up late, another irritation. Thus, I walk to Target by my lonesome and get some stupid notecards. I get money out, and realize I only have 3 dollars, sigh. Good thing I had change in handy, so I could spare my lousy 3 bucks. I buy the cards, get out of target, and sit outside of target by the fountain and attempt to do my HW. Oh did I mention my hysterical crying fit on the walk to Target? Yeah, it was horrible. I cried to Sara Bareilles and Coldplay, muttering all the crappy things troubling me. Anyway, sitting near the fountain, I start having a texting fight with Andrew, which was not pretty, on my part mostly. Sigh. After attempting to finish my vocabulary notecards, I get up and walk back to school, wishing I had a smoke(bad habit, I know). The walk to school was also tear-filled. I also tripped on a bag on the way. UGH. I get back and fight with myself for being a jerk to him, then I see him and apologize. He grabs my hand and takes me to the parking lot, for a smoke. Ahh, best part of this horrible day. We go behind a van, and we only had like 5 minutes. I start bawling, because of how incredibly horrible I feel, for treating him that way and for how unhappy I was feeling. That stog, made me feel better though(what a bad thing). Then we both realize that we're gonna be late but neither of us care at this point of my crying stage. He comforts me as I drop my bags and cryyyyyyyyyy. We walk back at last, kinda late. Sally, the yard duty, nagged us to stop holding hands, haha. Walking to music class, I did NOT want to sing the tardy song. So I walk up and see Ms. Greenwood who doesn't seem to be too happy with my tardy, but I didn't have to sing the tardy song. YES. So small ensemble, I get nothing accomplished. HA. I have to perform on friday, in 2 days. GREAT. And I get nagged at because she comes in while I'm off task STILL trying to do my damn notecards. WTFFFFFF. Ahh sigh sigh, pout pout. SO on to lunch.. Boring boring boring, its whatever nothing soo bad happens. 3rd period of English is killer. I fall asleep, the notecards happened to NOT BE DUE, since the teacher was absent. HA HA, just my luck, right? I guess this was an okay part of my day, since I laughed a little. Moving on, by this time everyone is alreayd GONE, since I'm like the only one who has a 4th period to go to. So levert passes me and jokes with me, telling me Andrew doesn't want to be with me, BLAH BLAH. JERK, lol. I then make the walk of shame to 4th period chemistry, ew. The class that I failed last year, that i have to re-take with lower classmen. FUDGE. Longest hour and a half of my life. I don't accomplish much of anything, except for getting caught up, since I decided to miss yesterday, due to the minimum day. Get my phone taken away with 10 minutes left, didn't do much of any work, luckily i got my phone back. Damnit. At last, I get out of school. My phone dies. WONDERFULLLLLL. Go to the bathroom with charger in hand and charge it. Levert calls me to pick me up, YESSSSS. I go to Andrews. It's hottttttttttttt, I'm like sweaty McSweaterson in Lee's truck, the damn window doesnt go down. Get to babe's house FINALLY, and stay for about 40 minutes. We fight a little bit and I cry some more(sorry babe). We do get things out though, and get some things solved. Then we make-up :D He gives me a popsicle, lemon lime, yum and we laugh with eachother. I feel so much better with him. Feel bad about not going to practice, ahh. Oh well, already done. My horrible day accounted for that. Damn. We leave his house and he has to drop me off at Lauren's. I go and my dad has to pick me up at 5. Greaaaat way to end my worst day ever, going back to lonelly Roseville. Yippee. And here I am now. Better, a little more calm, but still stressed and sad. Ah, I suppose I just need to take one day at a time and appreciate the good that overpower the bad. I'm alive, right? Everything these days seem so big, even when they aren't. Breaaathe Meagan. Love yourself, love others.
-Meagan.
